Thanks. He's been struggling with health issues for months now, and some days I just find it hard to cope. I mean, I even have these shameful, uncharitable moments when I just wish it was over one way or another, i.e. that he'd either get healthy already, or just not.
Obviously don't really want Dustin dead, because I love the little guy and it's not his fault that he got dealt a shitty hand with his health, and seems to have one thing or another constantly or rather chronic stuff in case of the mycoplasma thing. While I wouldn't have chosen to have a rat with such health issues that needs so many vet visits and meds that it sometimes seems just a sinkhole for time and money, it's not like I could dump him for being ill, and it's not like I'd trade him for another rat, even if I could. One reason for not having rats for a couple of years was that I wasn't sure I'd be able to deal with worst case expenses, so it's not like I was unaware that any rat might come with issues you can't know about when it moves in with you at the tender age of five weeks.
Not that that stops the frustrated petty thought from cropping up from time to time that I could have gotten the external harddisk and an MP3 player this year if my rat wasn't sick and I needed all that money for the vet. I mean, I just need to to look at him to realize that as long as he still enjoys life for the most part, I'll certainly expend the money and effort, and it'll be worth it. Like, since Easter Dustin doesn't really run around fast a lot anymore, but for example he still likes to destroy my stuff by chewing it through, to snuggle with his brother, to wank... (the little pervert is far more into wanking than his brother, and btw, few things are funnier than a rat loosing his balance because his mouth and both front paws were on his dick, he was balancing somewhere precarious, and then he topples over and falls down a bit right before he could finish and is all flustered and frustrated *g*), and he deserves as much fun things from life as long as possible. And if I hadn't paid about €200 in total around Easter for treatment, he wouldn't have, and obviously I hope treatment this time will give him some more time again.
So for the most part I don't think I'm that horrible a person for thinking that spending it on gadgets would have been more fun sometimes. *sigh*
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Obviously don't really want Dustin dead, because I love the little guy and it's not his fault that he got dealt a shitty hand with his health, and seems to have one thing or another constantly or rather chronic stuff in case of the mycoplasma thing. While I wouldn't have chosen to have a rat with such health issues that needs so many vet visits and meds that it sometimes seems just a sinkhole for time and money, it's not like I could dump him for being ill, and it's not like I'd trade him for another rat, even if I could. One reason for not having rats for a couple of years was that I wasn't sure I'd be able to deal with worst case expenses, so it's not like I was unaware that any rat might come with issues you can't know about when it moves in with you at the tender age of five weeks.
Not that that stops the frustrated petty thought from cropping up from time to time that I could have gotten the external harddisk and an MP3 player this year if my rat wasn't sick and I needed all that money for the vet. I mean, I just need to to look at him to realize that as long as he still enjoys life for the most part, I'll certainly expend the money and effort, and it'll be worth it. Like, since Easter Dustin doesn't really run around fast a lot anymore, but for example he still likes to destroy my stuff by chewing it through, to snuggle with his brother, to wank... (the little pervert is far more into wanking than his brother, and btw, few things are funnier than a rat loosing his balance because his mouth and both front paws were on his dick, he was balancing somewhere precarious, and then he topples over and falls down a bit right before he could finish and is all flustered and frustrated *g*), and he deserves as much fun things from life as long as possible. And if I hadn't paid about €200 in total around Easter for treatment, he wouldn't have, and obviously I hope treatment this time will give him some more time again.
So for the most part I don't think I'm that horrible a person for thinking that spending it on gadgets would have been more fun sometimes. *sigh*