Some fluffy Dratchet. Ratchet and Drift recognize their attraction for each other, but are unprepared for the gap of their ages, and all that it implies. If you squint you can see a plot. Sticky.
Words: 2533, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English
Everything is waiting on this damn deadline. Starting running again now that my summer cold is mostly gone. Cleaning the house. A social life. Reading or listening to or watching anything new. But whatever I have by COB Thursday is whatever I'm gonna have, so the good news is that the end is in sight.
*marks item off to-write list*
That is roughly 44,500 words of fluff -- for certain values of fluff -- in six (or seven, depending) fandoms. Fourteen Homestuck fics, four Chronicles of Narnia fics, three Star Trek: AOS fics, one Naruto fic, one Harry Potter fic, and two Inception fics (one of which is a fusion with Anita Blake).
I do have a second Cotton Candy Bingo card, and some unused suggestions from the first go-round, but I'm going to try holding off on those prompts for a few months while I get back to "Trollstuck" and "The Courting Dance" and "Lemonade" and "The Guardian in Spite of Herself" and all my other WIPs. And my NFE fic, of course. Can't forget that. And Yuletide, in due time, and Ladystuck, and all the other things sitting half-finished on my hard drive. Oh god, I have so many things to do...
But hey. I made a thing! And I am proud. :-)
Ugh. Editing is hard and all I can think is that thescienceofobsession must hate me for making her read this.
Silly goose, I LOVE doing this. I know how much editing stinks, though, so I’m sorry to do that to you! I would be a much worse beta but a far better friend if I just said ‘perfect, go!’ with no changes.
1. the mystery involved Jane going to help Adele in boarding school and I have always been vaguely resentful that Adele did not show up at the end of the book
2. the back description seemed to indicate that Mr. Rochester was basically not in it AT ALL because Jane was gallivanting around solving mysteries and had no time for him, which is perfect as a concept for a Jane Eyre sequel. All that should ever happen in Jane Eyre sequels is Jane running around doing a million useful things while Rochester stays home and pines. A+, completely true to the spirit of the book.
3. the idea of Jane Eyre using her accomplished sketching skills for the purpose of CRIMINAL FORENSICS is, like, the best thing ever. Let's not lie. It's amazing.
...unfortunately, despite all these points in its favor, the book was not particularly good at capturing any kind of sense of Jane Eyre-ness. I feel bad saying that because the introduction explains that Jane Eyre is very personally meaningful to the author. Jane Eyre is personally meaningful to me too! I just do not think Joanna Campbell Slan's personal Jane is much like my personal Jane. This Jane, well....
JANE: Oh look, a letter from Adele! Who has been stuck at school without seeing anyone for over a year due to FIRE AND DOOM plus new baby! ... I am pretty seriously offended she hasn't congratulated me yet on the baby, I cannot IMAGINE why she wouldn't be happy about this.
ADELE, IN A LETTER: AU SECOURS AU SECOURS AU SECOURS!!!
JANE: This is mildly concerning, but probably no big deal? Everyone knows Adele is basically a dramallama.
However even though Adele is PROBABLY just being a dramallama, Jane wanders up to London anyway, where she promptly sees the body of a schoolgirl being carried out of Adele's school.
ADELE'S TEACHER: Heyyyyy yeah so Adele was freaked out about the dead girl so we gave her some laudanum and she's been passed out most of a day? It's cool, it's cool, kids get hysterical about this kind of thing!
JANE, whose backstory trauma is literally ALL ABOUT DEAD SCHOOLGIRLS: Well, all this is startling, but, I mean, you know the French and all! Definitely still not ruling out a plain case of dramallama!
So Jane wanders off again. She makes a new society lady friend. She thinks about pretty clothes, because clothes descriptions are obligatory in historical mysteries. She ponders her new social responsibilities as mistress of the manor and decides she needs to do more charity. Eventually she gets convinced to go undercover as a German teacher to solve the mystery of the dead schoolgirl, so she does that, and then does solve the mystery, which mostly consists of discovering that the victim was a horrible monster that everybody hated, because having us feel sorry for a dead teenager would be too easy, I guess.
At no point in time does she do anything that particularly reminds me of Jane Eyre. But, like, I'm trying not to judge, Jane Eyre fanfiction is super hard to write. I don't think I could pull off the quality of Jane Eyre-ness either! The thing about Jane Eyre -- or at least Jane Eyre as she is meaningful to me -- is that she's fierce and difficult and self-reliant and weird, like, HELLA weird. And how do you throw all that fierce weirdness at the Standard Historical Mystery London and make them interact? It's an interesting question but sadly I do not buy this book as an answer.
The premise of the show is that back in the 19th century, the Norse gods were feeling pretty sulky about all the Christianity in Norway, so they emigrated en masse to New Zealand. They've been slowly fading away there, having greatly reduced powers and living almost mortal lifespans. When they die, they are eventually reborn as a descendent of the original immigrants, but they don't gain their powers or learn their godly identities until they turn 21. The show follows the four Johnson brothers, the youngest of whom has just discovered he's Odin.
I've only seen 8 episodes so far, and the show is mostly racy comedy (I'm assuming the dick pun in the title is intentional, because it certainly fits) with a side order of soapy drama. But along the way the show is also questioning various versions of masculinity and exploring power and gender relations.
With lots of beer and nudity.
Cover art by Author: reena_jenkins
Title: Tour Guide Blaine
Pairing: Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel
Rating: Teen and up
Summary: anonymous prompted: Blaine the distracted tour guide with a penchant for blurting out hilarious and slightly inappropriate thoughts
Download: the MP3 | Size: 9 MB or the M4B | Size: 2 MB.
Crossposted to AO3
Cover art by reena_jenkins
Title: Written On Your Heart
Fandom: Hobbit (Jackson movies)
Pairing:Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield
Rating: Teen and up
Summary: Every dwarf who has found his True One has a necklace with his/her name on it. Bilbo finds out from Bombur and Thorin gets quite fidgety.
Download: the MP3 | Size: 8 MB or the M4B | Size: 8.5 MB.
Crossposted to AO3
PACER (Public Access to Court Electronic Records) is the government-run online system used by lawyers, the press, and the public to access public federal court records in the United States. The administrators of that system recently announced that a huge number of documents from five federal courts have been permanently removed from its database and are no longer publicly viewable. For one circuit court, only documents filed within the last 2.5 years are now available; for two other circuit courts, documents now go back only 4 years.
Though this change appears to be part of PACER’s attempt to join the 21st Century—the removal is part of PACER’s migration to its NextGen system, which is incompatible with the decades-old legacy systems holding these records—it stands in sharp contrast to the Supreme Court’s acknowledgement in Nixon v. Warner Communications that the public has “a common-law right of access to judicial records” and to PACER’s own mission of making records more accessible.1
The removal of the files of five U.S. federal courts from its system deserves to be lambasted for many reasons (don’t worry: we’ll get to that below). But it can also serve as an important—and, we hope, enticing—invitation to the affected courts: Given that the removed documents are already digitized as PDFs and that numerous organizations have offered to host the documents for free, we encourage the courts to publish their records elsewhere and finally make their public records truly accessible to the public.
PACER’s removal of records on August 11 has been an undeniable mess. First, the removal happened a mere day after the plan was announced. And the initial announcement didn’t even provide all of the details of the change (a screenshot of the original is available here).
Given that PACER is the one-and-only system for Public Access to Court Electronic Records—including a number of important civil rights decisions the records of which were removed—more notice should have been given.
Second, this shift marks a serious step back, even for PACER.
PACER has long drawn the ire of open-government activists like the late Aaron Swartz and Public.Resource.Org’s Carl Malamud for charging users to access public documents (10 cents per page for search results and 10 cents per page for documents retrieved). These charges quickly add up—both for users and for PACER. In fact, according to a 2009 New York Times report, PACER had a surplus of $150 million. We believe PACER should not charge people to access the law. These records have the potential to impact people’s lives on a daily basis, and the fact that the fees have resulted in a profit is absurd.
The Cleaning Solution
For years, activists like Swartz and Malamud attempted to free court records for the public. In 2008, Malamud raised funds to put 50 years of federal appellate court records online, while encouraging other activists to do the same. Swartz heeded the call and wrote a program to download records that 17 libraries were offering for free as part of a pilot trial. Swartz’s program so alarmed those in charge that they shut the pilot program down, and the FBI even conducted a politically-charged investigation, though no charges were filed.
Since then, tools have emerged to assist in liberating court records. One such tool is RECAP, a Firefox and Chrome extension that allows PACER users to donate the documents they view to the Internet Archive, which can then be accessed by other users without incurring fees. The Free Law Project and Princeton University’s Center for Information Technology Policy maintain the extension.
In response to the current PACER mess, several organizations, including the Free Law Project and Public.Resource.Org, have sent letters to the Chief Judge of each affected court, requesting the removed records so they can make them available once again to journalists, researchers, lawyers, and the general public.
These organizations are giving the courts the opportunity not only to make the records available online again but, even better, to make them available online for free. The courts have nothing to lose and much to gain by fulfilling this request: the records are already digitized, and simply need to be hosted somewhere. The Free Law Project and Public.Resource.Org are offering to do just that, and at absolutely no cost to the courts, litigants, academics, or the public. We urge the courts to take these organizations up on their offer.
- 1. PACER notes that people who wish to obtain the deleted records can still do so the old-fashioned way, by requesting hard copies directly from the court. But, given that these records are already digitized and were previously available online, this marks an absurd regression.
Link to artwork: Artwork here!
Link to fic: Fic here!
Author: White Aster
Rating: G (art) / NC-17 (fic)
Content advice/warnings: Sticky and tactile/wireplay sex. Relationship building, phone(comm)-sex, mutual masturbation, dirty talk, voyeurism/exhibitionism, sizekink, happy ending AU.
Summary: A long-range shuttle, a communications mech, and a very long-distance relationship.
- This is based on what I could remember and google of the G1/IDW canonverse, but no doubt some things that are slightly off. The end is centered around a peaceful AU that isn't related to anything in canon (in-joke notwithstanding). Or, I suppose you could assume it's a-bit-future ongoing comicverse. Whatever floats your boat!
- This goes along with the idea of Cosmos as actually-big-and-shuttle-sized, rather like he is in the ongoing IDW comics, rather than cute little minibot Cosmos from the cartoon. Because we liked it that way.
- Many thanks to Heavybomb, Moogle, and Blue for beta-ing! :D
I knew him for vorns before I ever met him in person. I knew him by voice and comm frequency, by his ident across my HUD and the smooth cadence of his words. He knew my name, which is important when you are so often unmoored from everyone and everything. To him, I wasn't just TransCyberComm Transport Specialist 98645367, and when my assignments sometimes had me on-duty for a vorn or more a time, that meant a lot.
Before the war, there was a particular sub-sub-genre of romance fiction that centered on shuttles and comm mechs. The appeal was very specific, very niche, and it was mostly read (and written, usually under pseudonym) by deep-space shuttles themselves. Most other frametypes didn't understand the appeal, but every long-range space-faring mech understands what you mean if you call someone a "voice in the dark". There's nothing more intimate than being the only voice we hear.
What I'm getting at is that I fell for him before I even knew what he looked like, and that wasn't particularly surprising. I know I wasn't alone in that, over the years. He was The Voice, after all, as Cybertron became increasingly dark.
But before he was The Voice, he was just TransCyberComm Communications Specialist 11457.
( Read more... )
A long-range shuttle, a communications mech, and a very long-distance relationship.
(Blaster/Cosmos, written for the Transformers Reverse Bang 2014.)
Words: 6722, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English
- Fandoms: Transformers Generation One, Transformers - All Media Types
- Rating: Explicit
- Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
- Categories: M/M
- Characters: Blaster (Transformers), Cosmos (Transformers)
- Relationships: Blaster/Cosmos
- Additional Tags: Voyeurism, Masturbation, Mutual Masturbation, Long-Distance Relationship, Dirty Talk, Developing Relationship, Size Kink, Size Difference, Sticky Sexual Interfacing, Tactile Sexual Interfacing, Happy Ending, Inspired by Art
Er - this story has major spoilers for season 4 of Deep Space Nine. I don't know, it's a thing. The episodes they watch are "Body Parts", "Broken Link", "Looking for par'Mach...", and "The Begotten", in case anyone, ah, cares.
Fic:: Looking For par'Mach In All The Wrong Places
7000w, The Big Bang Theory, Penny/Leonard/Sheldon. Penny has started taking relationship advice from Star Trek. Things can only get better from here.
( and you're gonna be like, Bashir gets replaced by his counterpart from an evil alternate universe, Quark starts a Zumba class, and the Dominion attacks with hummus... )